I want to be transparent for a moment, especially since it is Mental Health Awareness Month. I was deeply depressed in May of 2012 around Mother’s day. I remember that day because I was not able to be with my daughter for the first time that mother’s day from no action(s) of my own. I decided to mute the pain via a raucous party at my home that Saturday night and just hang out with friends drinking, listening to music and partying. Since I have engaged in some serious soul excavation via the The Supreme Love Project I have learned to embrace and face my own pain. I have learned to feel it, and not be paralyzed by it. I have learned that miracles manifest through movement. Faith without works is dead.
As a mother suffering from parental alienation and depression from 2012 to the present, I just want to share my present joy. My daughter is now a freshman walking in her mommy’s footsteps. It is my hope and prayer that she really starts to understand how much I have always loved and root for her in spite of all of the series of unfortunate events. She is now a high school freshman at my alma mater, in the same college preparatory program that prepared me for a successful graduation from the Massachusetts Institute of Technology and University of Michigan Ann Arbor. Last year on her birthday was the first year that I did not stay in the bed all day. Last year Christmas I did not sulk in the bed all night either…depressed. This year’s mother’s day I am victorious, in spite of not having all my children in my arms.
This Mother’s Day weekend I have peace knowing that I have fought and continue to fight for the best for my daughter while simultaneously raising my gorgeous son with the support of my fabulous family that I would not trade for any family in the world.
When I went to my son’s Mother’s Day celebration at school on Friday I was overcome with emotion, and I had to hold back the tears because I treasure being my son’s mom. I enjoy every moment with my son, while being sad and disappointed that from 2012 up until this point that I have not been able to interact with my daughter due to parental alienation tactics. I am so thankful for every moment that my son and I are together because I know every single day what it is like to not be able to reach out and hug my own daughter, his sister. I treasure being my daughter’s mom and I take solace in the fact that I remain involved in her life in a limited capacity. I have peace and hope knowing that I have finally launched the next phase of this legal fight and I am waiting and I am trusting God to restore this relationship that was negatively impacted by individuals I trusted to love and support me and her that betrayed both my daughter and myself.
Since May is Mental Health month, and May 13, 2018 is Mother’s Day I wanted to share something personal that I have learned through the years of disappointment around my relationship with my own daughter. I have found that the things that have helped me to completely mentally and emotionally overcome the deep seated disappointment that comes with parental alienation in addition to patience is self care, self awareness, sleep, great diet, great exercise, prayer, and a thankful heart.
Hug your mom, appreciate the joy and love she brings to your life. Happy Mother’s Day.